Sunday, 12:24 a.m.   Fogged up Mirrors and Sparkling Dreams I miss my best friend. I always miss her. There are 45 kids on the swim team this year, so far. Sure a few will drop out, but hopefully we can kick ass. It's funny I say this because I'm not even on it this year. I need to find a swimming pool I can frequent more than once a year. my eyes are aching and my head hurts a bit and I don't know what im expecting from this. It could easily be he put it in the wrong chat window. I should have pressed matters further. I should have done a lot of things. "Hindsight is always 20/20." I can imagine what I might have done instead of calmly walk away. I might have walked behind him and wrapped my arms around his middle and kissed his cheek in a thank you. I might have touched his face Maybe he's not real. Maybe I'm just making him up. Maybe I'm psychotic and just seeing people who aren't there, and if that's so, then why can't I just kiss him? If it's not real then there's no pain. I fear rejection from a possibly imaginary boy.