2:31 Mid Thursday Afternoon   I Will Never Make It M's birthday party tomorrow -- we're camping...I hope the weather gets better. I'm making her a shirt for her birthday but I don't know what her size is - I brought a tape measure and I'm just going to have to tell her I'm making a shirt. or I guess I could say, 'Hey can I find out how big you are around your boobs? for research. you know.' I'm going to experiment with screen printing. My grandma and her hubby are visiting us for a few days. It's probably going to be awkward, she's going to think not only am I a Jezebel for continuing my belly dancing hobby, but probably also that I'm a hussy for living with my boyfriend when I'm in New Zealand. Oh i love that woman, so very very much..I just wish she also loved me. This sounds rather silly but today i am obsessing over my hair - not in a 'does it look ok' way, because let's face it, i didn't even brush it this morning (mwahahaha) let alone wash it...but the ends are getting SERIOUSLY split -- as in, if i tug on the ends, the bottom inch is likely to break off into my hand -- and i really need a trim. Problem is, it's almost as long as it was 3 years ago and i'd hate to chop it off again. but what the hell. it's hair and it grows back. So I need to relax and stop being so judgmental. If you can't escape your thoughts, you might as well be honest with them, I guess. These thoughts I can't escape. i'm trying to be honest. I'm hoping I mature out of them.