12:20 Early Thursday Afternoon   Sex. You're Doing It Wrong. I love how fantastically funny my Marriage and the Family class is. We discussed the dangers of stepping over categories and boxes psychologists think we should belong in, and then we discussed the barriers to intimacy. It was mostly about families of origin blocking intimacy by not encouraging it or by being too emotionally close or whatever. Frankly, I was surprised that religious upbringing, particularly those in more conservative sects, wasn't mentioned. So. I mentioned it. I was like 'What about the role Religion plays as an obstacle to intimacy?" which started the class discussion about toddler masturbation and the environments in which 'sex is bad. sex is bad. dont do it, you will die.' Then all of a sudden you're married and they're like, 'alright kids, go have fun!' it doesn't work like that, not in my opinion. Sex is sacred but it shouldn't be holed up in a dark corner that you do in secret, no one must know, because what we're doing is wrong. even in the context of marriage. There was a girl who ...disagreed with me, saying, yeah, it should be awkward and weird at first, but as you get to know your husband more in bed it becomes more natural. Thank GOD another girl piped up saying, no, it shouldn't ever be awkward with your husband and that you should talk about it before you get hitched and if you're uncomfortable with the discussion with this person you probably shouldn't be marrying them. I thought, HELL yes. I feel bad for that other girl. or maybe more for her husband/future husband. anyway I wanted to make a note of this discussion to remember it always. It's so interesting to throw this stuff out there in this ultra-conservative highly-dominating-religion town and 'culture.' The moral of the story is you're eiher doing it too early with the wrong people and stuffing up your emotional development and individuality, or you're frigid and can never let yourself enjoy sex, ever, because it's dirty. So...we're screwed! (or not, depending on the situation. teehehee giggle giggle) oh, and the other thing that reminded me of this discussion.. i was reading a yuppie middle class magazine that was going over ways to feel more refreshed in the morning - having sex in the morning was one of the suggestions. hmmmmmm. married life won't be so boring after all? If I can overcome the pressures and misconceptions of my youth?