Thursday, 2:37 p.m.   Magic Skies and Pretty Green Eyes Last night was so fantastic. And thus far, today has been good, too! Oh man, and tomorrow night is the Trivial Pursuit thing so that should be fun as well! Yet another good week is in store for me. Anyway, yeah, I went and walked to the park yesterday at 4 p.m. (GST +1200), and it was actually quite busy. By busy, of course, I mean one girl was swinging on the swingset and Caleb was sitting by the slide. Even though I came after he did, he looked up at me and said, "Am I late?" I laughed at him and said, "No, I am." And we talked (which is getting easier every time we hang out together), looked at the sky, stuff like that. I was sitting in the shade, though, shivering, and Caleb asked me if I was cold. I nodded and he put his arm around me! And we sort of cuddled like that for a few minutes, talking and whatnot. It was so nice. We wandered around the area a bit, and he asked me who I liked when I first got here. I was confused at first,but then I realised he meant who was I attracted to first. Which I found to be crazy weird because I had just been thinking earlier that day about how when I first saw Caleb I thought he was like super cute and all. So I told him that, but that I probably liked Simon because of his hair. (and the charming niss at the formal, but I didn't mention that bit.) Pretty obvious who I like now, eh? Mmm, and we went back to the park, we wanted to watch the sunset but there was a big tall house in our way. So we went through to the nearby little culdesac street and watched it set behind a house that was farther away. We laid on the grass and he looked into my eyes and told me they were magical. no kisses though, sorry kids. Da da da, we hugged goodbye, i went home, and asked my dad if I could go to the bible study. Caleb's house. So that was at 7:30, and it was so fun, but it made me miss all the kids in youth group, like Erin and James and Thomass and Elaine. So much, in fact, that I had a dream about them all last night. haha. I miss my swim team too. and my best friend, and Aaron and Taylor. *pout pout* Oh well. I'll see them again. Rah. Note to self: Don't fall in love this time. ----------------- 10:05 p.m. I'm only slightly obsessive compulsive. I haven't had a kiss in a long time, since June 30. The day Scott Left.   Well not a real one anyway, there have been plenty of pretend kisses, left in wishes in boxes on doorsteps, or in empty internet instant messaging windows. But the cyberworld is not nearly as good as the real world, and I think I'm finally figuring that out. I can't live my life in a computer terminal like I have been doing up to this point in time for the past... What's 11 minus 8? 3? Okay, well looking at it that way it doesn't seem so long, three years when I got hooked onto this internet thing. But you have to know I never had a life, and I was never a popular girl, and I always lived too far to walk, too close to drive distance from all my friends. And biking was a pain in the ass too, thanks to the hills. So I contented myself with sitting on the internet all evening, parading around from chatroom to chatroom, filling empty boring summers with meaningless casual cyber sex and faked intellectual chats and sharing fantasies with people from across the globe (Texas, maybe?). Here, however, I can get online to make plans to do something, even if that something is just sitting in a gutter, I find that the presence of one friend in reality is better than the presence of 8 in instant messanger windows. Cyber hugs are empty and cold, cyber kisses are meaningless and cheap, and cyber sex is even more meaningless and less thrilling than real casual sex. And I wouldn't even know, would I. Fuck, I'm such a good little girl, I've never even watched porn. I am 98.4% nice. Although I kicked Nik today and make biting sarcastic comments to my friends now that I know them. Funny how that works. Its alright to be mean to your friends. And it really is, too, a game of witty banter is such good fun, never meant in malice. I'm in a rambly mood, but alas it is 10:15 and I have got to do a bunch of stuff to do now, such as brush my teeth and hair, take out my contacts, put away my hair ties, and also change into something suitable for wear during the act which I am preparing for - sleep (if sleep can be an act). So good night. I love you all Teresa.