Tuesday, 3:38 p.m.   Sip the Tea, don't Gulp it It's been how many days since I last talked to Dan? Internet Crush. Like being in love with a machine. 15000 miles. Some amount of Kilometers. I don't know. Affection. Aaafffeeeccttiooon. I talk about it a lot. I like kisses and hugs. I like affection. I like giving affection. I like receiving affection. What can I tell you? It was mufti day today. I felt cute. Arina said I should avoid wearing these glasses in the future, because of how cute they made me. And that won't make any sense to anyone but me. But I don't care. I won't, of course, but just because personally I don't like the way I look in these glasses. You know what's so funny about my Yin? My lovely yin, my Sara? She's all "I had a good day-I was pritti today!" and it's silly, because if she had a good day every day she was pritti then she would be in a perpetual state of good days! And she doesn't have good days all the time (sad), poor girl. But everyone's got their off days. My point is she's always pritti. DAAAH. stupid people who are always pritti. like me (cough). Today was a bit boring, but It's all good. I was pretty(ish) and I got lots of compliments on the ugly retro tie. Caleb wasn't at school today but it's not a big deal because he doesn't talk to me at school anyway, very often. Sayla can multitask! He can sing and sail at the same time! heheheehe Or was it dance and sail? possibly all three, that's how good he is. You can only talk to me if we're alone. At school or in groups we're vaguely friends. We're a secret, the two of us. We're secret and mysterious. Possibly the only really secret and/or mysterious thing I've been involved with. It's nice, in a way. But all my friends at Home know, so it's really not that secret. But it's not like they can spread rumours about me.(and if they do, not a big deal-I'm not there. NEEENER NEEENRERRRkdjaldfkgh;dfkl!)...so it's still secret. because I said so. I miss him though, even though he's only gone for three days, who will I hang out with on Wednesday afternoon? We've come a long way in two weeks. We first hung out less than two weeks ago and barely said a word. And now we're having long conversations in the gutter, meandering around, sometimes we don't talk. Do we care? is it awkward? This entry is going no where fast. Do I care? is it awkward? Probably. Somewhere deep inside. OH! I almost forgot! I was taking a shower this morning, and I was rinsing my hair of shampoo, and I saw this daddy long leg thing spider in the indentation on the way where you put the soap? I was like "EEEEEK!" I didn't scream though, but I was so disgusted. PERVERT SPIDER! Man. I have this overactive imagination. I thought it was plotting against me. I was like "I can't turn around, it'll jump on me and attack me!" and I turned around anyway, and I swear to god I felt it jump on me. I gasped and swallowed water and the damn thing.... it was just...doing that spider crawly thing in the soap indentation. I hate spiders. Especially prevert ones! Stupid prevert spider! And so ends my day to this point. Goodbye. ----------------- 5:35 p.m. Dan, I just read my comments. What do you want me to do, write about you? Write about the things we aren't saying? When we're not talking to eachother because we're not online? What do you want me to do? And then maybe I'll do it. Maybe. However, you have a life. I have a life. Our lives are currently 15,000 miles apart. Sorry. I'm such a mean girl. 98.4% nice? Hahahaha. I'm way too mean to be that nice. I was so mean to Hyun Woo today. Hyun Woo? Hyun Joo... something. I don't know. I was like "Yes, yes, I have english now, I told you that already." and I just kinda wanted him to shut up. That kid gets annoying fast. He's funny though. Which is sad because he never means to be funny. I'm so horrible. And in the meantime I'll think about all the things I'm not saying to you. All the things we won't talk about. All the things I wanted to tell you but couldn't because it wasn't the right time. I listened to "Number Five with a Bullet" today. A lot. Scott told me he listened to it, and had it stuck in his head ever since I told him I had it stuck in my head. Like a week ago. And one of my close friends has a crush on him and didn't tell me. I wonder was she scared? And Scott still loves me, And I miss him lots, but I swear to God I'm taking Craig to homecoming next year. I don't care if he suddenly gets ugly (pff, like that could happen) Or a girlfriend (i suppose that's more likely), I am totally taking him to homecoming. His homecoming, of course, because I've already been to mine. And if his hypothetical girlfriend gets in my way I will pull the ever-powerful "if I don't get my way, I will be mad and actually fight you for him" card. Hahhaahahahahaha. Maybe not, but I will do something. If I can't take Craig then....maybe I'll get asked by someone else. *Shrug* it's just homecoming. Little sister is so obnoxious. Sooo Soo obnoxious. And I know I was just like that in sixth grade. Or was I? I didn't have friends like her, I wasn't cool like her, I didn't know I had to have expensive clothes to be cool like she knows. Maybe she'll turn out to be the preppy I never was. I hope so, because preppies aren't cool and I don't want her to be cooler than me. She's had a boyfriend and she goes to the mall and she gets the latest yummy lipgloss and looks at the latest ugly fashions. And tomorrow I'm going to the nearest Salvation Army to see if I can find suspenders (which are so last year). I don't want her to be like me. I want her to spend all her money in malls on overpriced lipgloss and tee-shirts with stupid sayings. I need to be able to mock her. I wish she was closer in age so I could judge her better based on myself, I don't remember five years ago so well anymore. When it's not my turn anymore, I am going to go and sit outside and make daisy chains because it'll be like with Caleb only less cuddly and more alone. And also probably darker outside. I wasn't sure how to tell him. But he read my diary and found out anyway. Loser, didn't even read the whole thing. Not like it was well-written or thought provoking or riveting in the slightest but still. stupid boy. ----------------- 7:35 p.m. To Anonymous: No, I meant prevert. It's my diary and I will make references to inside jokes when I please. Have you got nothing better to do than check the grammar and spelling of my diary entries? I have to pity you now. Feel the wrath of my pity. Useless. fucking useless.