Monday, 6:54 p.m.   I'm a Girl Who Gets what she Wants And when I have it, I don't want it so much anymore. Today I went to the zoo thingy with my mom, little sister, little sister's friend, and Caleb. I also sliced my finger open slicing carrots. Caleb and I also ate more than a liter of ice cream. I feel a list coming on. Top Ten Sorts of Kisses 1. Hard pressure, closed mouth, on the lips. 2. Quick pecks on the lips. 3. Open mouth, sensual, on the neck. 4. Quick closed mouth on the cheek/forehead/eyelids. 5. Eskimo! 6. Butterfly! 7. Soft, slow, slightly open mouth on the lips. 8. Soft, slow, sensual on the stomach. 9. Chivalrous, closed mouth on the hand. and last. and least. 10. Tongue kissing. Don't get me wrong. Making out is fun and all, but maybe I've just been making out with the wrong guys. I just. Don't like slobber on my face when im done. Tongue kisses might be better if they weren't so sloppy. I hate a sloppy job. Anyway. It's the way it always is. ----------------- 8:30 p.m. I was going to blow a kiss but my mom was there and i would feel stupid anyway. It's such a cute thing to do, reserved for lovers and best friends. I miss my best friend. Please let's keep us a secret. I don't want the whole world to know. The whole world doesn't deserve to know. Stop holding my hand, Look at my eyes and not my chest. Well, you can keep holding my hand, but only because im cold. It gets dark fast and the wind always blows the hardest when you're alone. I am the girl who slouches when she sits, with tired eyes and no meat on her bones. I make lists compulsively and count things that don't need to be counted. The world falls apart before my eyes and I never know what to do.