Sunday & EFY  So at first I think I'm going..... Yay all the excitment builds up. Then I find out I'm not going..... Natalies decided she's going to go again... Kinda crushed there knowing there's nothing but loneliess for the rest of the week. Then I find out I can go.... Kind of numb, not excited but not totally negative about it. Yesterday I spent crying. I don't know why mostly but I can give some excuses but they don't really fill the spot. First there was like 3 to 4 hours of sleep....then I didn't wanna go to Newton alone....then it was going to another 3 hours of church....then I wanted to be with Derek for some reason....then there was no being able to go to EFY.....then I couldn't make a decision on when to give Derek something. *shrugs* I felt like crying? Actually, come to think of it the MAIN reason I was crying was b/c I wanted to go 'home'. As in where we all belong. But the closest you can get to home is the Temple. I wanted to go visit it all day. My eyes looked really cool tho! I was like silent crying/in my sleep too! Anyways.. I tortured Derek the other night. I find myself torturing him on Sunday b/c I'm used to torturing Dallin... The next best thing... So yeah, that was fun, mean but fun. I painted his nails, pulled his leg hairs if he didn't cooperate. Took off his shoes and socks, and pulled up his pant legs (he hates all that). It was funny near the end there he started to sound like a girl when he pleaded for me to stop. mwhahaha...lol jk But in the end he has to, of course, use his strength and pin me down for awhile. That was hot. That's prolly the only reason I torture him, b/c he finally stops being passive and gets me back. mmm mmm. Anyways....after that we went for a drive...we were tired of being my basement alone...*cough* ..... so we drove around Smithfield up on snob hill and the whole time I juss sat there and stared at him. He's ridiciously hot when he's trying to look at you from the corner of his eyes with the lack of light. mm mm. I made him eat his first thing of carrot cake with strawberry whipped cream as frosting. interesting. Then I told him to take me to the temple. I decided then to give him his 'name' poem that I only give to choice spirits. I was scared about what he'd think of it, b/c it does seem kinda...weird at first. I gave it to him in the light and literally jogged around the temple square (block) uphill and down mind you! in a skirt and flip flops also! It hurt, but yeah, then I came back. We stopped and hugged there right in front of the temple! Eeee!! And we watched the bats fly around it! It was awesome! I went on and on about the poem trying to explain myself...I wouldn't shut up. I felt bad. I didn't know if it was the right time or place for it or if he even understood it. *shrugs* Anyways....Mutti comes in at like 10:30 and asks if I wanna go down and see if I can get in at noon. I rolled over and went back to sleep. At like 11:30 I finally got up and 'ready' I was really expecting to go and do other things today. I walked up to them and had like 55 bucks and said "I wanna join!" and the Session Director was Bro. Low himself (from our school) so he said, "Shure, yer in." They gave me a lil' lanyard with my name on it and said to get in line. The only thing I apparently missed out on was having my name 'typed' on the lanyard thingy. I got into Kirri, Lisa, Cassie, and Melissas group! Weeee! And Natalie ish all alone like she didn't want to be in the first place! *rubs it in Natalies face* mwhahaa... It sucked having to carry everything around with you on campus tho. So morrow I'll bring a backpack. The shirt is like a frickin' nightgown and keeps getting longer. Well, at least I'm modest. The weather like changes so much at first I'm hot, then I'm freezing, and then hot again. So I'll bring a jacket morrow too. Things can only get betta! Morrow we have classes most of the day! Weeee! Like all day Seminary! Excitement building up. I like the personal scripture time there tho. We played games and got to know each other 'well' I suppose. The only time I actually interacted with a guy was when I was either arm in arm with 'em or like that one kid that walked up and held my hand for a certain game. haha... Our group is the Stars and the Firmanent. We got juss by Stars. We have a lil' hand action that Bro. Low seems to favor. teehee....We are the best united group up there...besides the Pearls Before Swine. OOhh and Cameron was up there and he wouldn't stop ooggling at me. It was creepy. He's totally in love with me. But I'm in love with the food there. haha....Food my favorite part! I hafta wake up early tho. Natalies coming to get me at like 8:30..but I hafta get up even much earlier than that! I'll make a surprise visit to Derek in the morning if his bro ain't around. Teehee....I slipped him a secret note outside his door for when he comes home tonight in the middle of the night! teehee... "Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. I'm shure you already know. But I love you." I love secret surprises! But I wont get to see him for like a week straight b/c our schedules are so contrasting! Keeping us apart only means we have to break rules to see each other...*smiles evily* teeehee... I like to sneak around his house at odd hours and slip him notes....Apparently he's not really used to those kind of things....boy is he in for a surprise.... I'm the secretive/stalking kinda of person. He only comes around when he's 'invited'. I show up at odd hours. teehee...Anyways... *bites her nails* A whole week...like straight I suppose! I'm not too worried, but still...it feels weird! We'll both survive...I'm juss saying...it's never happened before....but it's prolly a really good thing...but then again he might be even more clingy....but maybe I should totally enjoy it while it lasts...but maybe I'll miss him unconsiciously.... ........Oh Shut up Brain!