Today.... Is NOT my day. Neither was Saturday. Lagoon with Min, Claine and Brax. Patsy babysat Cole. But having 'fun' with Mindy can drive a person insane. I was so excited to go play. And glad when the two hours finally ended. Today my bluntess has only made me self-conscious. I went to the face doc and he wanted to keep giving me pills for my incurable roseca disease. I asked the difference with and without the medication and he said "there wasnt much of a difference and that there wouldn't be one" WTF?! So he's just popping off a list of pills just for the hell of it? Cuz none of them make a difference? He tells me this 'disease' is not curable. And he gives me Oraseca er whadev. For what reason exactly? It obviously doesn't do much to an incurable disease. Then he tells me he can't diagnos me with Roseca b/c of my age (too young fer this disease). How's he gonna treat an incurable, possibly inacurate disease? Then he tells me he can control it. How can you control something that will be permanently red the rest of my life? Then he says there wasn't much of a difference with the use of medications. Then he tells me it can get worse. Which is a helpless statement due to the fact that it doesn't make much of a difference to try and 'control' it cuz its incurable and possible not even Roseca!!! I feel like I'm going in circles, don't you? And its all based around how much money I can spend on an incurable disease. I told him I wanted to stop all the medications cuz the end result obviously sounds like it'll end up the same whether or not I 'treat' the disease. If I care down the road and I see a huge difference than maybe I'll come back. But basically I'm gonna look like Grandma. Which is not horrible. The end. Then after that I wondered if I was being rude. Cuz I kinda had to interrupt his money making plans for the pharmacy and the vocal list of endless symptoms of the disease (as if I didnt know - I live with it everyday doofus) in order to state the fact that I don't care about his opinion. Then I talked about a sensitive subject to an over-exerted person (pulled an all nighter) who I don't really think cares that much about said subject, at least, at that time in the morning.... and well, that didn't help the happy sparks. Made me kinda solemn and docile. Then I attempted to steal the internet from the neighbors and only got as far as being told I needed an update Windows XP in order to do such. Frustration occurred. How do you update with no internet? And now here at work I'm trying to just keep to myself and work with limited conversing. Mistakes I made in the past have decided to haunt me today. I didn't make a coversheet for a case and took the wrong one to court, they, of course, didn't accept it and now I have to make the cover sheet I didn't before... My printer decided to print, in order, two of the first page then two of the second, which is not usually how it's done. I have a short attention span so I ferget what I'm doing and upon remembering, I have to get up out of my seat within seconds of sitting with the caution that I might forget again. And I've only been eating candy all day. Gummies, brownies, and cereal. Inbetween all this my brother has decided to try and set me up on a blind date with one of his friends. He says he's almost as short as me. Gee, thanks Dal. I feel better already. Then I got on someone elses Facebook (cuz I'm uncool and don't have my own) and saw this kids picture and it said RM, "marry me", Star wars geek, computer games geek, and band geek all over his face. He's a scrawny lil' kid that even I could squish my mistake. *sigh* And Eddie, the creepy guy downstairs, has offered me a job babysitting his handicap wife in the morning for $15 an jour. And if I wasn't such a gold digger I'd say no way. But now I don't know what to dooo...thats really good pay. Curse him for making me make decisions. My gut instinct yells no at me in the nicest way. I think I'll stick with that. I just want to go home and cry and hope nothing bad happens there. Watch I'll try and cook something and burn it, or me, something simple like so just to irritate me. I'll eat your soul!