Heartless   "You know you are in love when you see the world in her eyes, and her eyes everywhere in the world." -David Levesque "Thats Mommys growing beanstalk!" Monday ish Mutti and Kirris Bday. I went to Lagoon and got some cute stuff for both of them. I can't say what Kirri got tho. :P I hope she likes it. I tried to get something I thought she'd still think was...in style and cool. hehe I got me Mutti a really really cute teddy bear! It's like like blue with wings! Blueish green wings! She loves teddies and I love wings, it can be a representation of me! She can put it in her bear cabinet. It's so...darling! I love those 'cute' kind of gifts. *shrugs* Hope she likes it. I'm pritti much the only one left to put Muttis Bday together. Vatti doesn't do shopping (gifts basically) and doesn't do cooking or anything....so he's out of the picture. Dustin might give a gift but he won't be home so he'll give it early an' all. Then Scott doesn't care whose birthday it is, it has to be all about him. Mutti isn't selfish like me and want the whole day focused on her and thas what I want fer her! She deserves it. Vatti thinks Mutti doesn't deserve gifts therefore he doesnt want to use his money on her. Frankly, that pisses me off. Us kids grew up knowing that Vatti doesn't give gifts...at all...he juss had someone else do the shopping and then take credit for it. Gifts are a sign of 'love' and of course, anything that has to do with love, he must shun it. We grew up being used the fact that he does that kind of stuff and says mean things. We've learned to ingore it and get along with it. Now that the boy is in my life and gives (actually goes shopping for you) gifts from the heart, I've learned it's not right, nor healthy for him to do such. Mutti has dealt with it for a long time by juss saying "Fine, if I don't deserve it then don't get me anything for my birthday." That's not right. That's not healthy. I've learned there's better out there. She deserves presents! She deserves everything! Even if it's merely because she is a Daughter of God. She is my mother and I love her and am grateful for everything she has done for me. She is going to have a good birthday, get presents, have cake and icecream from us even if I have to go shopping and pay for everything myself and put other ppls names on the card and bake the cake myself and do all the services for her that night. Juss b/c she doesnt want it b/c it might be too much hassle. She wouldn't do that to me. I don't care how old she is, if she's tired of it or what not. She's getting presents and it's going to be a happy occasion! Or in her words, "You are going to go! You are going to be HAPPY and you ARE going to SMILE!" hehe My Vatti lately, has been pissing me off. Besides me having a stupid panic attack over a simple sentence in the middle of the night in his nasty tone of voice, "I'm disappointed in you." Story of my life. Tell me something new next time. He'll give a four year old a saw! A freaking saw! A drill, a knife, a hammer, some nails, anything the child wants! Now it's funny when Vatti ish stupid enuff to do stupid things to hurt himself....but when it involves others....grrr. You can harm yourself all you want, but don't involve others that don't know any better. Then he acts like the child is handicapped or something when it comes it cleaning up his messes. It was hilarious yesterday as soon as Mutti left the child had dropped a glass bowl which was full of rocks in the rose bush on the porch. *rolls her eyes* Then I went in and watched Dr. Phil (yes, I watch that show) and forgot I was babysitting. Soon I remembered and went to the side porch calling his name and he came up and tried to push me back into the house yelling "You can't come out! You can't see! Don't come down the stairs" It was obvious he had done something wrong. It was funny, I asked "Why can't I see? What did you do?" He got so mad at me for accusing him of doing something wrong. "I didn't do anything! Don't come see!" Then I asked again trying not to laugh, "What did you do?" and he kind blurts it out, "I didn't do anything with the gasoline! I didn't smash any tomatoes!" I eventually went down the stairs without him being angry and saw smashed tomatoes in the driveway. Then I followed the smell of gasoline to the pumpkin patch where he had gasolined the pumpkins. *rolls her eyes* But today, today he only came in the house as soon as Mutti left for work, with blood all over his fingers (still bleeding) wiping it all over his shirt trying to stop it and wiped it on me also. It was icky. He had blood all over his shirt and his finger was still bleeding. He said he had broken two glass bottles on the sidewalk. Grrr! Obviously he had cut himself on the broken glass and tried to cover it up but couldn't stop all the bleeding so came to me a lil' late. We didn't have bandaids and he screamed the whole time as if I did it to him. Stewpod... So I found some bandaids and went out to clean up the glass in the driveway from two Jones bottles. Jones bottles of all bottles. Grr. I went out in my hippie pants and high heels and picked up glass for an hour er so. I was soo angry with that lil' piss ant. I don't understand why he all the sudden decided to throw glass on the sidewalk as if it wouldn't break and play with it when he knows it hurts you! So I asked him, "You juss decided to chuch two glass bottles on the ground juss b/c you felt like it right?" He looked dumbfounded and nodded saying, "Yeah." I asked why he did it. "I don't know". I was irritated....it was frustrating. I think it's the babysitter. Or else this child is an evil demon monster something. They want me to go on pills. They can all juss go sit on a stick! The Demon Child and the Heartless Father! And Mutti ish going to have a good bday! I don't care who has to die! Its going to happen! I think I shall go sulk in my anger now.