For some reason I've been thinking about if I had a nickname, what it would be.

I think I'd pick Stargirl.

It's from a book I grew to love, I would say from my childhood, but it didn't publish until my teen years.

By Jerry Spinelli.

"A story about the perils of popularity, the courage of nonconformity, and the thrill of first love, an eccentric student named Stargirl changes Mica High School forever"

Inspiring to me to be different and to love different people.

A staple for me, like The Little Prince.

He also wrote a "sequel" a few years later called "Love, Stargirl"

Which reminds me of my little catch phase "Love, Me" from my favorite song by Collin Raye.

This book is just a giant 274 page letter to her ex-bf Leo in the form of journal entries basically.

As I read it again, my favorite so far is the Jan 3 entry:

"And now I'm smiling through my tears. Remember the first time I saw you? In the lunchroom? I was walking toward your table. Your eyes - that's what almost stopped me in my tracks. They boggled. I think it wasn't just the sight of me - long frontier dress, ukulele sticking out of my sunflower shoulder sack - it was something else too. It was terror. You knew what was coming. You knew I was going to sing to someone, and you were terrified it might be you. You quick looked away, and I breezed on by and didn't stop until I found Alan Ferko and sang "Happy Birthday" to him. But I felt your eyes on me the whole time, Leo. Oh yes! Every second. And with every note I sang to Alan Ferko I thought: Someday I'm going to sing to that boy with the terrified eyes. I never did sing to you, Leo, not really. You, of all people. It's my biggest regret.... Now, see, I'm sad again."

I find I relate to this too much in my old dating years.

I know that look... the terrified look on a boy as you motion him to come over to you...

That look that says he'll backpedal as soon as he gets a whiff of a question that might require some committment on his part, something akin to a date...

But sometimes you just have to scare the crap outta them.... and ask them out!

Someday I'm going to ask out the boy with the terrified eyes.