I just want to open the pantry door and food to pop out at me and say "Eat me!"

But I own none of the food in the pantry.

For that one night, in that one place, I didn't feel fat.

Ya know how some ppl say that Judgment Day is gonna be like you and God watching a movie of your life, see every thing you did, when you didn't think someone was watching, when you were all alone, etc.? And everyone fears the embarrassment, guilt, and sadness that will come with watching said actions?

Well, I feel like my J. Day is gonna be a movie and a novel (with this journal) which induces double the embarrassment if I say so myself. In movies they have the dialogue that was said, not what each character was thinking, so along with the movies actions and words, they get the thought process of the character, written down in some type of book, now whether or not that is more hindering/embarrassing is the question...

I guess I still have a fear of the content of this journal coming back to bite me, even after I'm dead and gone.