Mother bought me boobs for Christmas. Quite literally.
Okay she paid some lady to stuff a bra with pads (works better than kleenex) bascially as much as she could without it "looking fake" and strap it nice and tight to my overly large rib cage with an extender. It’s like a bullet proof vest for yer chest. Nothing is touchin the twins anymore! Not even me.... which sucks when I get an itch.
When I turn profile in the mirror I can see that I actually have boobs now, kinda cool but very deceiving. A guy better like me for me before he finds out. And it helps with the posture, makes me wanna stick out my chest all day if it didn’t hurt so much. It also helps porportion out my body more...gives more of a pear shape than bottom heavy object. I’m not used to my boobs being in the way when folding my arms, pointing directions, or such activities. It kinda hurts cuz they like dig into my arm pits and restrict my shoulders. As Kirri says, "Pain is beauty girls!" In short this bra covers A LOT of unnecessary area. Mother said the purpose was to "look better in certain clothing" (example: V-necks) Whatever.
Right now I feel icky with my perm with no chemicals to keep it nice and crisp so it just hangs there with braids mixed in making it feel/look like dreads.
People ask me what I got for Christmas and I don’t have a couple gifts that just come to mind to tell ‘em. I would make more comments on my gifts but my family thinks I complain about everything, when in truth I am really easy to please. But here’s my list:
- pink puffy ball of pillow (Grandma)
- jewelry box (Grandma)
- A "love at first bite" hat (mom)
- foot massage lotions, etc. (mom)
- Hymn book (D&L)
- Scripture stickers (D&L)
- Precious Moments mug and picture frame (Mom)
- Christmas story book (with bra appointment attached) (Mom)
- "Do’s and Don’t’s of Dating" book (Mom, dropping a hint ya think? seriously)
- Two JUMBO journals! And one regular one! (Mindy and Grandma)
- necklace and earrings(Renee)
- necklace just like Mindys
- another necklace... I can’t remember
- I keep getting earrings, but I don’t have my ears pierced. (Patsy)
- the Neo Pet I gave myself
- Rock Band I gave myself (I’m an Indian giver)
- blue Snuggie (just like Grandmas from Mom)
One word to describe my family and holidays: TORNADO
"Please don't let me go
I desparately need you"