Note to self: Do not fart in enclosed area and then attempt to use mouthwash.

I have no social life and my religious life is swirling the toilet, but I have a fast computer and I'm rich!

Ooh to be able to pee without the phone ringing and/or not be in mid-pee while some delivery boy yells "Hello?" thru the office.

The sacrifices I make for food. I will find a Quiznos and I will travel to it no matter where it is!

IKEA!!