Pathetic I have no idea why I'm on here. I'm not going to the Sweetheart Dance. I've decided, it just isn't meant to be. Oh, it breaks my heart to say those words. But somehow, the tears can't come anymore. I'll dress up in my pritti dress... Do my hair all pritti, climb in my smelly smoky truck and drive away. I'll go to Subway by myself and maybe even get pictures all by myself. All I really wanted from this dance was pictures anyay, just to prove I was there with someone....and to complete my picture wall I have....But nobody cares anymore. I'll drive to an isolated place and dance by myself. I'll take a walk by myself. I might even go to someone elses house like Alicia's.... I'll just get away. Sadness. Mindy is coming tomorrow I juss want to be alone Saturday tho. Mutti and Dustin are leaving for a week. Mindy is the replacement Mutti. Which means I get two younger brothers that will drive both of us in sane and a Vatti that I'll hardly ever see. On Single Awareness Day....I mean Valentines Day I think Braxton will be my Valentine and Scott will be Mindys and maybe we can go to the Olive Garden and eat with our certificate. *shrugs* Shoulds like fun, or else stay home and eat pizza and watch movies. I'm juss waiting for someone to tell me how my life is going to be. Mutti says I want to be unhappy and I don't want to have fun. You can be happy this way. Somehow. I don't really want to have fun. I don't want to belong to a 'group'. I frankly don't really want friends, juss people to say hi to in the hall is fine with me. I don't want to go to college and and I don't want to date anyone else. So yup, prolly unhappy and no fun. I know it's stupid but the Sweetheart Dance is like one of those "Prom" moments, where the girl's break down in hysteria if they don't get to go....but here in Happy Valley those dumb dances are all the chance you get to be fancy and fun and yes, I enjoy them and would love to go. I know I'm pathetic.... I'm not going to the Sweetheart Dance... It's where we started...and where we end...