apparently. being. a slut. is far easier. than or then? i imagined.

i dont know what i expected. with so many years. and. terribly. horrible. experiences behind me.

i should know better? i shouldve understood? it explains a lot though.

i was always too blinded before. to see. or feel. their intentions.

i was usually too high. too drunk. too awake. and. too sick. to notice.

until it was ALWAYS too late. by then they had gone. and taken pieces of my dark heart with them.

but. even then. among the loneliness i failed to notice. that they just wanted my sex. and. my attention.

and. now. some secret upon the other secrets of my heart. locked in the dark dusty cabinets of my mind.

i never imagined BEING. FEELING. two men. so close together. and now my changed heart. is. TROUBLED.

.