and around my brain. taking away the drain. pushing aside the pain. fixing the insane. correcting the mundane. all.because.of.a.few.lovely.voices. in. the. night. danielle. ray. my people of small.amount.of.close. people. calling me from a distance. hearing me from a distance. and. missing. me. i have learned through times.hard.times. that not all of it is meant to be worth cashvalue. not all of it has to be store bought. or. man made. some times. no all of the times. lately. the small things make me breathe. again. anew. the small things like. running water. pipes. cold food. warm food. food. showers in the morning. a bed to lay in. a place to come to. a. place. those small things. and. hearing from those that i love. even. if. i wish i didnt. but. i have to. because. no one else will. or. would. or. could. and. i guess by now im sentimental. given the fact that i just smoked and choked. given the fact that i have vodka to drink. i am a bit sorrowful right now. a bit lonesome. a bit tired. a bit excited. a bit confused. and. a bit frightened. BUT fuck all of that and this and those. life. is. panic. is. fear. is. moving. is. living. breathng is the key. and i need nothing else. because i have all ill ever need and miss all ill ever really have had. i would like to teach life. a lesson. and. love destruction. and. pain. and let go of the fear of dying one day. because. that day wasnt yesterday. so i have it still. in my grip. so why not. enjoy. the trip. i feel poetic tonight. repetitive. but. poetic.