i got a new friend. turning into an old friend. who is crazy as all get out and entertaining. we have fun together. my tooth is infected again. youd think. you know. youd actually think that after 2 1/2 years later id actually had done some THING about this little infected tooth. i hope. it doesnt. go. septic. because. once that hits. im guntz to be one dead motherfucker. no joke. so ill probably never see that guy again. ever. ever. never. and by THAT GUY i mean that guy from new york i let just fuck me. virginity? 25 years? dont be crazy. from virgin to whore in point 5 seconds. im faster then a mustang. and almost as pretty. i havent spoken to him since the other night. he left town tonight. o well. thats the way we get down in hell. drink. meet. fuck. leave. end of story. im worried about my new job. im worried about making an ass out of myself. but roberto seems confident. he expects a lot. and maybe thats what i need in my life. a little expectation from someone. i dont want to let him down. because hes come up. done something. seems like a good person. and my karma needs repair. major repair. a tune up. and out. i also needs me a type writer. i need to get all of the words out. every last one of them. i want to write the story about real life. real. reality. my past enemy. it isnt so hard waking up. its staying awake thats the hard part. no more numbing. no more hiding. and ill buck up and do this job great. because i know i can. YOU MAKE YOUR LIFE.