"I just can't take it anymore..." well today got off to the usual bad ass start. m and i will never be able to get along esaily. willingly. i'm sitting here slightly tired. slightly ill. i don't know what to do really. i do know that i have a paper to write today and some stuff to read for my classes tomorrow. seb and i were supposed to go to a concert yesterday. she never called. it's not like a bought the ticket or anything. i was waiting to see if she still wanted to go. our friendship is wearing thin. i think i may have to leave seb alone for awhile. it kind of irks me that she and j wil ask mattguy to go out all the time, but never think to invite me. o, silly...of course i never want to go out. (feel sarcasm) i figured seb went to the concert with j and mattguy anyways. maybe they're too good for me. (as are most people i know apparently.) i don't care. seb's annoying. and whiny. and bitchy. and spoiled. i can deal with a break from her. she wants mattguy anyways. her boyfriend's bestfriend. kind of pathetic really. i'm not thinking about mr. p anymore. well i am now because i'm typing about it. but he's not on my mind as much. i've decided to forget about men and relationships and all that stuff for now. i have weight to lose. a tan to get. and hair to grow. i want to look perfect at graduation. i will get there. indeed. i don't think i can handle another long weekend. i'm beginning to go insane with 4 days to do nothing. i guess i could invest in my future and actually study once in awhile, but seriously will i ever do that? NO. i didn't think so. i would call and see if seb wanted to go out tonight, but i don't really think i want to go with her. they're all downers. babies. they don't know how to ride a good time. besides, i'm the one who usually gets trashed. i wish i had someone else to go out with. i don't though. i don't have any friends. i'm a loser. indeed. (indeed has become another fav word of mine.) i think i'm going to go do the dishes and then vacuum and than maybe clean my room. something to keep me busy. moving. breathing. "There are no days like today." DFN.