[another holiday down the pisser] "Why don't you ever wear girl sweaters?" *Because I don't fucking like girl sweaters. Bite my nut bitch. Aww. yes. the fucking holidays. Fucking Turkey day. The fucking gobbler from hell. (Did I ever mention that I hate holidays?) Well I officially do. John's been dead almost a year now. This is our first Turkey day in 6 years without him. M is a bitch. A needle in my side. A thorn in my paw. On and on. We have nothing for one another. There is no relationship to save. Nothing. I've grown tired of it all. Of this whole fucking mess. [breathe in] [breathe out] I'm beginning to wonder if running away would be the biggest mistake of my life. Would it be a mistake at all? No. I don't believe so. I like the thought of picking up and passing by. Leaving this place far, far behind. All I'd leave is a note on the table that read: FUCKING GOODBYE! And that would be it. (All she wrote, or all i wrote?) Whichever. I'm willing to leave them all behind. Friends, (the few i actually have). Family, (those i kind of like). And well everyone else in this shit-hole-of-a-town. I'm so tempted. More than tempted. I'm on the edge staring down. Ready to leap. Ready to let it all go and fly. Hit the road. and hit the air. Get on up. And get on out. Kick my legs. Scream. And then fucking shout. As I said. I'm more than tempted. I have it all planned out. plotted. O. Whatever. It doesn't matter. At all. O. "I only have but one bullet..." DFN.