He opened the door and briefly inhaled. The cigarette tasted slightly different blended with the cool night air. He wondered if it was all coming closer, if it would all end soon. He wondered where else he could run too. Overhead the moonlight pierced through the dark blue clouds. He wondered if his soul would ever heal, if his wounds would ever close. A soft breeze blew across his face reminding him of the task at hand. He had to find forgiveness before he could find peace. They would never let him go gently, easily. He would have to fight his way through this embroiled mess. He would have to plead if not surrender his soul forever if he wanted to get out completely. The entire night became one frightening obstacle. Slowly he raised his hand and waved at the moon. Somewhere, someday someone would love him. Someone would hold him and assure him that no matter what he was going to be okay. All he needed now was another stiff drink and another cigarette. The smoke already surrounding his head was beginning to dissolve. He would remember what he loved most about the world. The long hugs from a good friend, the quiet way his mother spoke to him, and the gentle whispers given to his ears by his one and only true love. How complicated all this had came to be. If only he had known before that his sins outweighed his miracles. It was too late now. Eventually they would find him and make him sorry for all the pain he had caused, all the grief they had suffered. There was nothing now that no one could do to rescue his already doomed soul. If only he had known love before. If only he had understood the meaning of the word, understood the entirety of the feeling. If only he had been born to this world naturally, purely, without reservation to trust his instincts. If only they would allow him one more chance, one more opportunity. He knew that it was too late for evil had already sealed his sad, sad cruel fate. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I oft wonder what would be if nothing was If all the world fell away If all the world crumbled Pieces falling down Into the sad universe Depression is a shared emotion A sad expression locked into a sad soul Riveting poetry makes it all the more complicated Adding to the fire so the blaze burns brighter Illusions of happiness Delusional paranoia of sadness Naturally inclined to cry Naturally tolerated horror Hollowness Emptiness Only those who understand Can fully comprehend The heart and it's complicated Emotions Flowing forward, faster and faster Filled with lonely sacrifice Filled with lonely tears ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Beat that. I am done.