Destiny is one of those lonely things I still actually believe in. My present destiny is screwed. My past destiny was brighter. My future destiny is far out of reach. I carry these odd beliefs in such ordinary things. I believe in signs. And signals. And small, subtle messages. I believe in magic. And miracles. And warnings. The things I believe in are based on all of the things I've learned this far in my life. I have learned that the less you care about what others think, the less you are inclined to follow the mass society. Conforming is not my type of game. I attempted to buy 'GIRLY' clothes today. I failed. I realize now that it's not what others see me as, but how I feel about myself. I also realized that most girl clothes are uncomfortable and 3 times more expensive than buying a polo shirt in the mens department. Go figure. As for the whole Mister P and me thing. Old news. Water under the sinking bridge. Another person to have a momentary connection with. I cannot ask for more than that. With or for anyone. My time is of the essence. Of importance. I am no longer carrying around the burden of bitterness. I am slightly worried that I may have jeporadized some thing I enjoyed. I can only hope that my mistaken anger will not remain as an enemy between us. I spoke to a good friend today. Sarah. I miss her more than I thought. I thought we would enjoy a break apart. I was wrong. She's one of (if not the only) person I know who is always looking out for someone else. She has this innocence about her. I thank her for our friendship. Tomorrow I have classes. I was preparing to study for a test I don't even have. And I thought I was behind. Tonight I feel relieved. Even if tomorrow rips my heart out, at least I feel like this right now. I watched a very good movie just now. SNATCH It is about the London underground. It was gruesome and crude, but quite entertaining. Brad Pitt played a Bare-knuckle boxing Gypsy. Gorgeous George (an old boxer) played an old boxer. Lots of violence. Lots of smart aleck remarks. Lots of cursing. Lots of everything. All of that for a huge diamond. I am hyper. I am happy. I am done for now.