"Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts." ---Albert Einstein He was a wise man that Einstein character. Like usual nothing thrilling has happened for me. Nothing. Monotonous days. Oh well. I can't complain. I sort of love the rain. It's been raining almost all month. I like it. The windy, gloomy weather. Matches my insides. I've given up on trying to be what others expect me to be. I've given up on wanting to be different. I've given up on feeling things for certain unattainable people. All in time, ya know. Everything happens in it's own time. Things get ruined if they're rushed. Of course the pain in my heart hasn't healed yet. But like everything else that will take time. More time than I'd hoped, but it will heal eventually. Eventually. My favorite word. It makes every situation sound hopeful. SEB is boy crazy. She's also very annoying. I don't think we'll be hanging out much this summer. She prefers to follow around E. Don't ask. Everything guys do is adorable. Listening to her speak makes me ill lately. Ill from annoyance. Girls are all the same. I should've been born male. Don't take that as a 'sex change' topic starter. Guys are just better equipped mentally. Well almost. Maybe not in the intelligence department. But as far as sense of humor, sense of relaxtion, and of fun are concerned, guys are more inclined to make me happy. I don't know. I'm just not a girlie girl. I never will be. SEB is just, well shady I say. I think I'm afraid that I'm beginning to find out that I don't really like her all that much. I'm pretty sure it's wrong not to like your best friend. I don't know. I'm glad I met her, but lately. She seems to needy and clingy. I don't know how guys deal with that. Oh well. I'm sure my opinion will change. I had no dreams last night. None. I had a dream once about a white room, an old bedroom of mine, and once I opened the door there before me stood an angel dressed in all white holding in her hand the head of another angel. I apparently dream in epic form. My mind is distorted I think. It doesn't know how to process real, logical thoughts. Hmm. I don't really feel much today. Well I do feel extremely lazy. I have no more clean clothes. My rooms a mess. I haven't taken a shower in two days. And I sleep nonstop. I need to get over this virus of procrastination. It's a pain in my ass. I'm going to begin working on my art. Once I get my money. I think the first piece I work on will be for my mother. I can picture it in my mind. I just now have to figure out how to piece it together on a canvas. I'm sure I'll succeed. Eventually. Well there isn't much else on my mind right now. Nothing really important. Oh well. Done for now.