things are rapidly shifting. i can barely hang on. hollywood and i are no longer pals. not even remotely close. to it. i know i talk shit. i know i fuck up. i know i do this. i know i do that. i know i drink too much. i know i lie too much. i know. i know. i know. but dont act sooooooooooooooo. fucking cool. dont act like everything you do is unmistakenly awesome. because in reality. all you are is some gay kid being kept by an older man. because youre too damned scared to venture out in life. and you think youve done it all. seen it all. said it all. know it all. but. thats besides the point. this is me venting. i try to change. i want change. i cant remain the same. i know this. i need to grow up a bit more. suck it up and bring it up and get up. i may talk shit but i accept people. and things have upside down here. i came here with an open mind set and it suddenly turned bitter. im trying to right the wrong. maybe this is just moving on time. maybe trying on people is just beginning. the past is the past. i will not concern myself. any. longer.