we went out. to the bar. wednesday. i got drunk. i got nervous. and ill. and shaky. and angry. angry? i guess. it's hard to really tell. i can't. don't. remember much. i think something was crawling on my chin. a second ago. it itched. horribly. it's much better now. i think. tomorrow. i will try again. to be a new person. a new. me. a new. something. i don't know yet. i feel like painting. more. and another. one. i've already completed one. onto the next. as it all goes. i'm tired of the old. routines. and things. and dreams. nothings ever what it seems. dfn.