last.night. went from boring no good evening to passed.out drunk feel good evening. which turned abruptly into call in sick day today. we went to dans. and. drank a bit. and. chatted a bit. and. i was apparently the first one down. and. out. which is alright considering. i couldve said or done or did or taken off many things to regret. this morning i woke up to mandy putting me back in dans bed. and. we all got up. and. talked. and. laughed. and. decided to not go into work. and. dans house was amazing. full of things ill never have. full of things ill never touch. amazing. and. large. and. rich. and. dans too young. definitely too young. i often wonder why the guys in my life are never suitable. either too young. too taken. too homely. too fat. too mean. too careless. too distant. too uninterested. too.too.too. its beginning to grate on my nerves a bit. i want to make out. i want someone to fuck.with. im not looking forward to work tomorrow. i should/a gone in. i couldve gone in. damn drinking. damn it all to hell.