I WANT TO BE OUTRAGEOUS AND SAY FUCK YOU. TO EVERY LIVING THING. AND NOT BE THE NORMAL THING BUT THE ME THING WHO DOESNT GIVE A FUCK. I WANT TO BE ALIVE AND REAL AND READY AND LIVE LIKE THERE IS NO TOMORROW BECAUSE THERE MAY NOT BE A TOMORROW. AND THEN I WANT TO BE THE RESPONSIBLE ONE WHO LIVES AND DOES THE RIGHT THING AND PAYS MY BILLS AND PAYS OFF MY DEBT. BUT WHY. WHY AM I WORRIED NOW. BECAUSE PEOPLE SAY I SHOULD BE WORRIED. BECAUSE SOCIETY EXPECTS ME TO BE WORRIED. ABOUT WHAT. MAYBE CHAOS IS WHAT I NEED. MAYBE OUT OF CHAOS ILL BE BORN. BETTER.