Gently the rain taps against my window. Tap. Tap. Tapping out a rhythm to some forgotten tune. A beautiful storm is brewing. The thunder booms softly against the sky kissing the lightining as it passes by. A beautiful time for dreaming. For loving. For breathing. For living. In awe as I watch the gray sky gain more darkness. The moon off in the distance pleading to show. The shadows of trees swaying to the lovely rhythm. Back and forth. Gently now, back and forth. The viciousness of the wind wrapping itself around the house. This small shack. I stand still staring at the moon, while the moon stares back. I am in pain. Emotionally and psychically. He hasn't called or e mailed me. Damnit. Some times I feel so confident, while at others I feel so low and pathetic. Tonight I feel very pathetic and very low. I can't and shouldn't do this to myself. Get crazy over him. He may not even be worth my time. Fate may be showing me this. Maybe. I feel ill tonight. A little nervous. A little sick of the toothache. I am almost insane from the pain. This weekend will be over tomorrow. Already. So sooon. Days don't last like they used too. Nothing does. Weekends and summer vacations used to drag on. Now it's all over in a heart beat. Quicker than quick. Part of me wants him to call. The other part just wants to forget about it. I am torn. Ripped torn. I am done for now.