forgetting all I'm lacking completely incompletely i take your invitation you take all of me i don't know what to write actually. I'm just here because its routine. and I am waiting for my hair to dry before going to bed. i want to play halo actually. but i would be up all night. i have things to do tomorrow. not important things unfortunately. today went by so fast. Timmy woke up at like 11 or something. he kept coming in to wake me up "you gonna wake up??" lol thats the dreaded phrase on his days off... lol jk. its just i fall asleep for a 10 minutes or a half hour but it seems like 10 seconds. so after a few times it just sounds like he's saying it over and over and over... if that makes sense. i woke up around 12 something. i made him a grilled cheese and we fumbled through the paper. we hung out a little bit.. more like talked.. he was upset with me.. but I'm not gonna say why because I'm dumb and its stupid but its fine now. we got silly and i ended up on his tummy on the couch and we talked and goofed around. and then we fell asleep. FOR a LONG time. it was like 5 when we finally woke up. we slept the day away. i love it tho. random naps in the middle of the day with my lovely husband... irresistible. i don't think it gets any better than that. when we went to get food later, Timmy wore this blue sweater he got a long time ago from the gap.. i forgot how cute he looks in that sweater.. he doesn't think so. but its true. i think he should wear it more often. we practiced together a little today. between nap time and food. that song classifieds by the academy is and some others.. ish. not much but it was fun. i like playing with timmy. i really want to play drain the blood but its impossible to find anyone to tab it or just a website that had it.. i don't know why. its a popular song. the res 63 guitar tabs on 911tabs... so you'd think there would be at least a could drum tabs. who wants to just listen to a guitar play a song like that? obviously acoustic songs can get away with it but that song is far from acoustic. bah i wanna plaaay it. but i bet if i did have the tabs or music, it would be way to hard anyways. its pretty fast :/ I've been feeling a little defeated by life lately. i think its just knowing things will probably get worse thats making me feel so helpless. i don't like feeling helpless. its probably my least favorite feeling. more than betrayed or angry or annoyed or anything. i can't stand it. but theres nothing i can do about it. it being pretty much every situation I am in. besides me and tim. i never feel helpless with timmy. we were watching the island. cuz.. we watch that and we are both so annoyed with the guys in that show. they are so chauvinistic. stupid idiots. timmy hates it too.. i think timmy is one of the few guys who doesn't act like an ass. one of the few truly humble people in the world. he doesn't think guys are bigger and better and stronger and smarter and blah blah blah just because they have a penis. its refreshing. whoa. i am registered with this online babysitting thingy. and a man contacted me because he needed a sitter from 8-5 m-f for the month of november for his 3 year old twin girls. and since he would be staying in a hotel, he drops them off at your house on his way to work. After i read it i thought... that sounds kinda familiar. and it was. i didn't even need to look at the other messages I've received because a while ago i remember getting a message just like it... same thing.. 3 year old twin girls.. for a month in september.. 8-5 m-f and at your own house. everything was the same except the first one was from a guy named richard and this one was from william. i told timmy about it and how it was sort of weird but asked if i should do it and just meet him somewhere public before giving him our address. but timmy said no, it sounded too weird. and then today i got an email from sittercity saying that they canceled his account! so it was something weird. what if it was some creepy guy who sends those messages to random people on that site and they agree to babysit and send him their address and he goes there and murders them and steals things.. and stuff.. bad stuff.. well anyways it was weird and creepy and thank god i didn't respond to him. what would i do without my timmy. I'm just too naive I guess, but timmy is smart :} *sighhhhhhhhh*