uhg. I closed this window and i was writing and i lost everything. o well. this weekend= crazy. complete nonsensicalness. it was so random and stupid. Well. NOt the stupidest. In the past it would have definately counted as top 5 stupidest things. buttttttt this time it wasnt bad. I think I needed it. so i went to santa cruz to see brett. i mean he lives in chico and its far and i dont see him and he was close. but he said it would only take not even 3 hours. it took way longer. and when i got there we were supposed to hang out a few nhours and then i would leave. but i got there are 8 instead of 2. and my mom said she didnt want me to turn around. so i had to stay. annnnd well when i got there. brett was all sick and throwing up. and it was fine i guess but weird. and then i was exhausted so i went to sleep and i wake up cuz brett is in the bathroom throwing up again annnd he tells me to call 911. sooo. i did. and the firemen came. and the ambulence. all these dudes here for bretts stomach flu. cuz thats all it was and he knows it. anyways. the next 4 hours were spent in a hospital. then we went to get some food. at 5. and then finally back to sleep. oi. it was exhausting. I needed a trip. to get away. I had an awful lot of time to think. I had an awful lot of time to process. especially since i got lost for hours and hours.. i was driving almost 10 hours. and then the drive home was almost 6. uhg.uhg. uhg. and the drive back was even more intense. I learned a lot tho. I learned that I ABSOLUTELY hate to drive a stick shift over 2 hours of time. I learned that I am afraid of truckers. I learned that having too much sun on one side of your face can make you reeeeally dizzy. I learned that I hate hospitals at 1 in the morning until 5. its the worst. I learned that tim doesnt care about me. I mean seriously. going out or not. if u want to be all technical about it.. we were engaged and he should care. he didnt even call me all day today or yesterday to even see where i was or if i was ok. and still.. no call. at first i was feeling weird about my little adventure to the middle of nowhere.. but as time progressed I realized.. psh. why am i caring about someones feelings who doesnt even care if I am ok or not? no idea.