[894] Curve balls

i'm engaged! timmy asked me to marry him on wednesday night. well... it was 12:30am on thursday so it was barely thanksgiving and he said he had presents for me. And i was like... presents? on thanksgiving? ok..... he said there were 3 of them. For christmas last year he got me a stuffed frog. so i thought, maybe he was upgrading me to a stuffed turkey???? a day or so before thanksgiving we were talking about his brother and some stuff that happened. crazy things have been happening lately. and its been so stressful because had been feeling like at any second we we're just going to fall apart. cuzfor so long i felt like #2 to timmy when it came to anything... especially his brother. and with all thw nonsense with his brother going on (calling me a bunch of dirty names and breaking my computer) i felt like... it was just a matter of time before aaron broke more than just stupid objects.. and actually managed to split us up. it was really getting to me. and being the passionate/emotional person i am.. i couldnt help but feel overwhelmed about it. i brought up the aaron issue with tim one night and ended up crying about everything else on my mind. about how i felt like i was crawling around on my hands and knees in a pitch black tunnel and i dont even have a light at the end to make it worth it. i said that i keep hoping for a miracle, for tim to throw me a curve ball... and im always left disappointed. and then timmy held me while i cried. after a good cry i calmed down and we went to sleep. the next day i had work and came home around 9:30pm. we watched a movie or something. and then we just hung out. and out of nowhere timmy says he has presents. he tells me to sit at the edge of the bed and close my eyes and then he's all rumagy (yes thats a word) in the closet. for a split second i think ..."omg he's proposing!" and then im like... "no.. shut up. ur just going to be disappointed like on ur birthday..." and the thought passed. he kneels down infront of me and says to open my eyes.. and the feeling that he's going to propose comes back.. then he hands me the first present... a little camping lamp... and i couldnt help but laugh... cuz it was so random. and i kinda squinted like "huh?" i think i said thank u and then he told me why he bought me the lamp.. he said that the other night when i was crying it made him sad when i said what i said about the tunnel and crawling in the dark with no light. he said he doesnt want me to feel like im crawing in the dark anymore and that he wants to give me light.. a reason. tiimy isnt one for romance.. so it kind of blew me away that he would get me something so meaningful. then he handed me present number 2. which also made me laugh.. a baseball. he moved it around in his hand and read what he had written on it. things like "i love you so much" and "i want to spend the rest of my life with you" and then he turned it around and read what it said out loud "will you marry me?" i started crying. then he showed me the ring. its beautiful. its a princess cut solitare. just what i wanted and he got the set where the wedding band wraps around the engagment ring. its perfect. I was so excited i didnt think of anything else. i just wanted to tell everyone... and then reality set in. thanksgiving was a disaster. my family made tim feel awkward. and his family did the same. families are ridiculous sometimes. he hasnt told anyone on his side yet becuase they were awkard about a compltetly different thing. and we kinda just decided now isnt the time. iwant his mom to know tho. cuz she seems to like me. we told ryan, his cousin too. i told some people i worked with.. lol john is so funny. he kept telling me its fake. but its not. and i think i made justin feel uncomfortable cuz he has been living with his gf 3-4 years and isnt thinking about marriage. but the way he reacted seemed like maybe his gf is. its so crazy. timmy is affectionate and loving and really tries.. but ever since he proposed... he's been amazing. he's answered every question perfectly.. he's said all the right things and has been nothing but romantic ever since. about everything going on with our families, he says we dont have to worry about them and we should just focus on us. i was afraid about his family and he said not to even worry about it because he doesnt care what they think or say cuz he's with me with or without their blessing. and he's telling aaron that he wants to move out next month. he's going to put in the 30 days notice. everything in timmy and jeni world is moving along... but everything in family and us world is kinda bad. but timmy is right.. we cant let that get to us. we're moving forward. i have a job at best buy and im looking for another one. and working towards my graphic design degree, and timmy has connections with both the land rover (sp?) and ferrari dealerships.. mostly landrover. but thats still a great opportuniy. and we just need to stay focused on our goals right now. when i was at work. after i told them about being engaged... i said "i called my bf blah blah blah..." and alex is like.. "boyfriend??? dont u mean fiance`?" and im like.... OH yeahhhhhhh! i like how that sounds fiance`.. cuz its got the fee and the onc and the say.. and its sexy. ok im basically done. adios.
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