today i went to cruz's bridal with my mom. didnt stay long. the dresses were ugly. we went to another bridal shop but it was closed. So then we go eat lunch and i went to the church offices to help her cut flyers to put in the church bulletin. everyone was happy to see me. well pastor zach and pdk. pdk has some weird death magnets and he broke pz's desk. oops. so yeah after that.. went with the mother to her office and looked online. i found something CLOSE to what i want. close. as close as ive seen yet. but. its a size 16. lol. soo. that sucked. but we saved it just incase. only $250 too.. way less than i expected to pay. but 16? bah. soooooo basically i go home and burned some cd's for donoman cuz its his 16th bday today. and then we went over to his party at tim and pams. it was pretty fun for a 16 year old party. didnt suck. well mostly. i mean. gah. amanda kinda gets under my skin sometimes. i love her generally. but geez. sometimes. cuz. were all talking about wedding dresses and she asked what kind i was looking for and im explaining and she said "me too" and im like cool. but then she's like "the lady said.. nvm. i shouldnt say. its mean" and she like wouldnt say whatever it was she was going to say. but its like if u know ur not ging to say it or if its mean.. why even bring it up? why even put it out t here? cuz i know she was probably just going to say that the lady she talked to said that ball skirt dresses only look good on "large busted" women. and amanda happens to be just that and i happen to be just.. not that. and she said it on purpose. this isnt the first time she's done that kinda thing. its like she knows her "assets" and if she has something u dont have or its better.. she'll make a big deal out of it so u feel sucky. and its sucky. cuz i dont do that to her. altho i could. i mean. i could eat 50 big macs and never be as "large" in the mid but did i say anything? did i think it? no. not until she said what she didnt say. bah. u know. the stupid people at these bridal shops lie anyways. they just want to sell a dress and get commission. i was told that my figure was the best for the style too. but did i say that? no. cuz then she'd feel sucky cuz our figures are so opposite. but im not rude like some people. maybe i should be. bleh. anyways. then another sucky thing happened. kelli was talking tome about her baby shower and asking me for ideas and i was just talking, being silly. and we were tlakin about what to name her baby and i was just saying weird stuff and she's like "you can call the baby whatever you like" and i was like ok and saying all sorts of silly things and were laughing and then. and then right after that conversation, she yells across the room to amanda and andy "so will you come to my baby shower???.. i'd really like you to come blah blah blah". and im like. dude. im sitting right here. i mean i dont care who u do or dont invite. i guess im not cool enough but at least ask when other people arent around. geez. but besides that kelli is awesome and so is jonathan.. i just think their cool and would want to go tooo but o well. but then the real fun started. played some ping pong. and then manuel and aaron dared me to poor HORCHATA down donovans swim shorts. and i did :) they didnt think i would. but i did. and it was freezing. and it was funny. and then he chased me and TRIED to throw me in the pool. but i had a death grip like no other to the fence. and then we were right next to the jacuzzi. and he's trying so very ahrd to knock me in and he pushes me and everyone is like "OHHH" like when someone gets pushed in the pool.. but i like did a matrix jump and hopped over the jacuzzi and ran away and they were all like WHOAA cuz im ninja like that and it was funny. and some dude was like "that was the coolest thing Ive seen all night!" lol. idunno if it was that cool. but it was matrix-y. so i guess it was. and then. i danced. and sang the HORCHATA song. manuel loves the HORCHATA song. i took pictures. and then pam showed me and tim pictures of luke and talyas wedding. cuz we might do it at that restuarant.. le chenge or whatever. it was pretty nice. but im still gonna see if my mom can talk to these people who have a huge backyard in granada hills. she said someone just had a party there and it was for like over 100 people and it was awesome so that would be cool cuz im pretty sure it'd be free. its a backyard. yeah so then we went home. we're gonna do engagement pictures tomorrow. finally. my mom's doing them lol. its gonna be kinda weird but o well. and tim said we can go to le chenge and check it out. my knee is getting worse. i need a doctor. it used to just hurt when i would put pressure on it when getting up from kneeling on the ground but now. it hurts whenever i bend it. or if it twists a certain way. even my nervous leg twitch feel suncomfortable. i stood up on a chair tonight and when i was getting down i almost died. cuz my leg locked and it hurt soooo bad. i think it might just fall off one day. its that painful. o well. anyways. i should sleep.