I'm pissed off people.
firstly. Stupid job. I'm so over this finding a job nonsense. just keep swimming seems to translate to just keep getting a slap in the face. They said theyd call me in a few days. and they aren't calling and Im just.. hold on... so i just called and the lady i spoke to and interviewed with is going to see whats going on with the job.. but they already said I had the job. if they freaking gave it to someone else Im going to stab you in the face. yeah you.
other than WAIT and be sick all week and wait more for a freaking phone call from a stupid job that's most likely eventually going to screw me in the vaj.. seriously.. if they dont hire me.. the least they can do is call me and tell me about it so Im not sitting around wasting my time wondering. ok ok ok.. new subject..
I've been looking at wedding stuff. I made a new wedding budget. I didnt want to go overboard because I think we'd rather spend money on a house. but I do think weddings are a huge deal and one of the most important days of 2 peoples lives so i dont want it to be a dud. it'll be small compared to most weddings but not so small that it'll be cheesy. its enough to have a nice dress. nice pictures. nice food. and a nice honeymoon :] and thats all that matters.
that is. once i get a job. the budget was constructed with this latest strand of hope in mind. hmmm.
i chickened out of calling jason. and then i got sick. honestly right now. i could go either way. i think i should. i think he should pay for HIS mistakes and his obnoxiousness. plus the fact that he even sid to me "everything i put him thru". Usually I just get mad. and i did. but first i thought about it. A LOT. and I did nothing to him. I gave him everything. He should pay me just for being awesome. I mean he was in control and i was following blindly and he has the nerve to complain about it. i barely ever asked to talk about serious stuff... and when i did i'd get a bunch of garbage about how im always talking and 5 minutes later i just shut up. yeah we did always talk.. about nothing. so when something IMPORTANT came up... i wanted to say something and he was a douchebag about it. no no shut your face and take off your pants. so basically.. i deserve to yell at him. i will feel bad. but i dont care. im thinking I'll feel better after. it feels nice to stand up for yourself once in a while. why do i care about him? whatever I dont. I just want to solve this and move on. not only is it the right thing. its like.. closure. need that too. yes. and then the end. no more jason. bah.
and the 'joke' in his header is lame.
its raining.
I forgot to sleep last night. and eat all day.
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