I downloaded an album of cover songs inspired by double rainbow. Its phenomenal. I especially like both acoustic covers sung by girls. And the last techno one is funsies.

Work is going ok. I had lunch with people in the break room today. that was fun. i usually eat alone. they asked me to eat with them so i did. and i liked it. it wasn't weird even tho they are all a lot older. i havent seen trevan around for a couple days. its been pretty quiet. and boring. there are a few new people in the office. i think one is renee and i dont even know the guys name. i was never introduced. i have always had a problem going up to people and introducing myself. so now.. its been a week or so.. and i still don't know them. so we dont say hi. and its really starting to get awkward. i don't know how to fix it. i could just intriduce myself now i guess.. but now its really weird.. and the more time goes by the weirder it is. uhg. i wish someone would have just introduced us the first days. its interesting how i learn different, useful things at each job i am at. not just about work but about people. like most of my old jobs were not that social. this job isn't either but more so than i am used to. my last job i saw 1 or 2 people. this job i see 5 at least everyday. my last job was in one room so u get there you say hi and you leave and say bye. this job its so ridiculous. people are that is. i guess its just common knowledge that when you leave work you say bye to your coworkers. even if you havent talked to them all day. i didnt know that. most of the time in the beginning i hardly told my boss i was leaving. now i see people do it so much i do it too. another thing me and tim were talking about one day was about how its awkward when someone walks by you more than a couple times.. like if they walk by once you say hi, maybe have a short chat usually. the second time maybe a hey or wave or nod.. the 3rd and 4th times someone walks by you at work.. what then... ? i usually just smile. i think that's right. But its still weird. at least im not the only one who wonders these things. tim said that the guys on the radio station he listens to were talking about it.

Apparently I'm doing good tho. My boss seems to think so anyways. I am always feeling anxious about being fired tho. Ever since Vincent was let go out of nowhere.. i feel like it could happen any day now. I literally walk into work thinking "it might happen today". and i don't like bringing in my lunch and get scared the most of days i do bring a lunch because the only other time i was let go from a job was a day i brought my lunch and something about walking in and walking right out with a sack lunch is just extra humiliating. uhg. that was a horrible day.

i gained so much weight. i want to lose 15 lbs before christmas. i don't think its going to happen. I've been drinking more water tho.

Panda is annoying.

Jefri is cute.

My mom is reading one of my aspergers books.Its called Aspergers and girls. I thought that'd be a good one because most information on aspergers is on boys and so she probably hasn't heard much about girls with AS. i dunno. i'm interested to hear what she thinks of it.

My cousin erycka broke up with her bf. he lived in nebraska and she was planning to go to school in nebraska. yuck. at the state and the cliche. but now she's going back to her original plan of moving in with us and going to a school out here. hopefully, not likely but hopefully we'll be in a different apartment/house or whatever by then. i hate this place :(

When i told tim about my cousin wanting to move here again he said "she can be a babysitter". :) I wasn't even thinking of that. i mean i had before. but i didn't even mention it and he said that. It was nice. I like when he says things like that.. i like when he thinks ahead and plans our future. I don't care if the plans come true or not. its the thought thats nice.

k time for bed.