Listening to: michelle branch
Feeling: lovely
yesterday was really fun. block party started at 3. I took a nap till 4 and then i went to check it out. it was ok.. i ate so much food. i was alone eating food but i was happy cuz food is fun. my brother went up to tehachapi to watch my cousins soccer game. and brought him back. so manuels gonna be here till monday. so thats cool. i missed manuel. caitlin's wanted to hang out for a while so.. HEHE my mom let me take her car to go get caitlin. woot that was fun. yeah driving is fun. grr i need a car. but yeah me and caitlin are such dorks. we thought itd be fun to play chubby bunny with gum balls.. yeah that was stupid lol and kinda gross.. later the band up the street was playing and they sucked really bad.. so we went around taking a survey about how bad they sucked lol.
anyways later me, sal, caitlin and manuel went to city walk to see that show but the it was canceled. grrr. but it was still fun.. well... me and caitlin had fun. sal didnt want to be there.. and he made that pretty clear. grr. but yeah it was fun. me and caitlin got huge sugar sticks. hehe that wasnt good.. jeni+sugar=BAAAAAD!
you know.. i get the feeling im gonna have another vannessa experience. "this is just temporary" she said.. well its been a year and some odd months and she still isnt around.. not that i want her to be. but its funny how people lie. but thats ok cuz you know what?? i had an inteeresting nite last nite and everything is gonna be ok...
when i got home.. me and brother were at each others throats... and then it turned around and he broke down and he told me alot of things that he's never told me before. that no one has ever told me before. he told me he loves me. he said that he is my brother and he's the only guy i can trust because he isnt trying to get into my pants like these other guys.he said that im beautiful and lovely and and gorgeous and desirable and pure and all sorts of stuff. he said i dont need a stupid guy to bullshit me (his words) and make me feel that im special or beautiful. cuz i already am. all by myself. and i kept putting my head down and he wouldnt let me. he told me that i should have confidence in myself because i am so this and that and that.. this is the best thing he said well among other things.. but he said "i wish i could someday find a woman like you.. i desire a woman who is as beautiful and stubburn and (gosh i cant remember everything he said but you know..) as my sister." cuz he always says im stupid and a nag and all sorts of stuff but i guess he lied heh. and he told me well in his own words.. which were way better than mine but.. he said to go to him.. not to some boy. he said to find comfort in him. cuz i am lonely and stupid right now. but he said he'll always be there for me if i need anything. or justa hug. he said to call him and wherever he is he'll give me a hug. even if he's in class or anything. he said he doesnt want me to be a stupid girl. and i dont know. he told me so much, too much to write in a little box. and i would hardly be able to do it justice anyways. i wish i could tho. but yeah. it was the best conversation ive ever had :)
i think every girl needs a big brother for christmas this year. yup thats what i think.
hmm. i forgot how much i love michelle branch.. i sure do.
i dint go to church this morning. the brother was talking to me till like 4 in the am. so i slept right thru my alarm clock and everything.
hw time..
Read 0 comments