so sometimes i like having aim on in the background just because. i barely talk to people but if im available why not. especially since all my classes are online and most of my life involves a computer.. so anyways.. Sunday night I'm working away on some hw. well not hw i finished it all but some book practice stuff. and i noticed i wasnt logged in so.. i logged in.. and whooooo was on??? who?? jason.. *shifty eyes*
ugh. it bugged me. and then. tonight... I am all worky on school stuff and out of nowhere.. blaring out of my speakers was a crazy loud "MOOO!" and IM like what the heck?? and i guess when i was "seeing" Jason I put an alert on his sn. and it bugged me again. yesterday i didn't know why but now i do. Because.. its like you have a person in your life and its fine.. but then you detach yourself from them and its all great and after a while you start to forget about them.. and then its like they don't exist at all. and its nice. because then its like... all the stuff you didn't want to happen didn't actually happen. make believe is how I get through life. but make believe doesn't work when its moo-ing in your face... erg. and also.. why now? he said he didn't ever go on aim.. why is he ruining my aim time.. now I have to like get a new sn just to have some normalcy again. its haunting.
it just brings up all the crap that made up a month of nonsense. and i was blamed for it. "everything you put me through".. what a jerk. ahh.. will not go into excruciating detail about why. want to. but wont.
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