todayyyyy i had an appointment at davids bridal. I went with my mom. She likes weird dresses. All the dresses were soooo beaded. and ugly. and plasticy and prom dressy. and theyre alll strapless and stupid. and when you ask if they have anything with no beads, they look at you like your crazy. who buys those ugly dresses anyways? one thing I loved tho was the under garments! i had no idea so much went under the dress. The pettycoat thing was fun and the wedding bra thing was awesome. I want 5.they make you all skinny and your boobs all big. i didnt find anything i wanted. or anything really close. well kinda but not really. but it was fun trying them on. when i slipped on the first one and the lady was buttoning the back, it felt weird. For the first time i felt like I was really getting married. my mom got a ticket but the thing said 7am-6pm its ok to park but no parking between 2am and 6 am. and it was like 2:30pm and we were only there for 10 minutes and there were other cars around too. it was gay. im fat. im not just saying that. i really am. working out is homosexual. bah. ------------------------------------------ me and timmy got in a "fight". but not really. i think it needs to be over 5 minutes and actually involve words to be considered a fight. sometimes i think he is perfect and other times Iget so freaked out.. i mean how scary is it to not be able to have a conversation about your wedding? lol. kinda ironic. and it wasnt even a bad conversation. well it shouldnt have been. I just wanted to let him know I was thinking of him and wanted to know if he thought we should postpone maybe because if I am feeling overwhlemed Im sure he is too and everything is so stressful and expensive and I just wanted to let him know that i dont just "expect" anything. but somehow he took it wrong. maybe i said it wrong. and nothing good came of it. i have a cankersore the size of your face on my throat! i swear its just growing and growing and right in the middle, theres a mini rock band gettin down.. it hurts. it throbs :( I think Im starting to annoy timmy. i need a job. i dont know what to do. i guess anywhere is good for now. as long as its something. better than sitting around here feeeling like a loser. er. more to say but Im falling asleep.