i hate myself. I lost him and its all my fault. i should have known to put him in his cage at night... but the cage is soo small. and i boarded up the patio thing real good. and jefrie isnt one to escape... he's like a puppy. he knows i feed him and he loves people. yesterday night i went out to get the frozen water bottles i put out there when its really hot so i could freeze them again. he was so cute and following me around and i thought maybe i should give him a bath today and let him play inside, since tim and aaron would be at work. this morning, i went to bring him in to bathe him and he just wasnt there. i looked around the whole patio but its really small so theres only a few places he could be and then i walked around my building looking in the plants but, whats the point? like he's just going to hop out and be like "here i am!" what am i going to do? having jefrie with me, i know its stupid and sounds well, stupid... but it made it feel more like home. not home as in my mother and her nonsense. but my room. and the feeling i get in that room. an independent feeling. and i dunno, he also made it feel like this is just temporary. until i can get my own place. and maybe he can have a whole backyard to run around in. but now it doesnt matter.